The main problem with Teen Burgers as an item is their construction. A&W tends to use really crunchy iceberg lettuce, more white than green. When stacked high with the other ingredients, this makes the Teen Burger a formidable foe if you don't have Shaq's hands or a garbage can mouth. A&W insists on serving their burgers in foil bags (awful) because they feel it is part of their brand. In reality it just means that every burger is slid into a godawful pouch where the ingredients are allowed to slip around until you eat it. I get kind of stressed just thinking about this because paper wrap would make these burgers look so much better. They wouldn't be as messy (Teen Burgers are notoriously sloppy).
I ate this particular burger on a plate because there was a woman in the room and I am a man of style and grace. I have only supplied a stock photo, but please understand that this particular "Teen Burger" was named in reference to the lost 15 year old who put it together in between hiding a boner for the fry girl and just completely hating his parents.
From a taste perspective, the Teen Burger was very nice. One complaint is the onions, which were foosty and pedestrian. Onions are a major complaint of mine with fast food in general, but A&W seems to stock particularly pungent asshole onions that I hate. Foolishly, I forgot to say "NO ONIONS" in a slightly louder voice than the rest of my order.
I would fuck this burger but I wouldn't marry it.
***.5 out of *****
